World Leaders, Don't Call Me PDF Print E-mail
By Lawrence Bienemann

By now we’ve all heard of the famous ‘16 words’ that got President Bush into trouble during a State of the Union address. You know, the words about ‘weapons of mass destruction’ that mobilized a country to war? Since the President is on the list of national leaders who don’t call me for advice, I thought I would use this a space to offer all of them some other words.
I have seven words. I think they’re great and they might serve us all well as we get older. Whether world leader or anonymous neighbor, I think that if we all could adopt these simple words, we would make giant strides in improving our relationships -- especially with those we love. And, in the case of the president (or any other political leader) relationships with those they serve.

I’ll break them into simple sentences and I’ll use some of them twice. Ready? “Please forgive me.” “I forgive you.” “Thank you.” “I love you.”

While I’d like to take credit, these sentences are not original but were developed by Ira Bryock, MD. Dr Bryock is a Palliative Care physician who has worked to help hundreds of patients remain as pain-free as possible at life’s end. The sentences come from the part of managing pain that is about cleaning up our relationships. My thought is that since we don’t know when the end is coming, why not get a head start?

Why not start now getting rid of regrets? Cleaning up old hurts? Smoothing over past “rough patches?” Why? How many times have you heard some lament that they never had a chance to say good-by --let alone to use the seven words?

By the way, “Thank you.”

Lawrence Bienemann is the RSVP Program Coordinator in Vermont's Northeast Kingdom. You can reach him by e-mail at This email address is being protected from spam bots, you need Javascript enabled to view it

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